Over the years I've had my fair share of first dates, most of them have been for the dreaded arranged marriage purpose. But nonetheless they were dates. Some of them have been so charming and romantic, some absolutely disastrous. I think if ever a Wall of Bad First Dates were built I would contribute more than my share of bricks.
So being a veteran at First Dates I have a few Do's and Don'ts for guys out there hoping to find a special someone in their lives, even if its for a romantic interlude and not a life long commitment.
Do's
1. Dress smartly- By that I dont mean a three piece suit, but a crisp well fitted, ironed shirt with comfortable pair of jeans that are not washed out or frayed is the safest outfit. You can never go wrong and you would never feel out of place. Wear comfortable shoes but smart shoes. Wearing flip flops or slippers is only if you are meeting at a beach. Even then loafers or sandals would be preferred. Dont wear more jewellery than her.
2. Groom yourself - No need for facials and mani-pedis. A proper haircut, your nails cut and clean. Clean shaven or a well trimmed beard is all that is required. Your perfume or deodorant should not be an announcement to your arrival. Also do not have any kind of BO. Nothing is a bigger turn off than a smelly person. Always have some breath mints before you meet, more so if you smoke.
3. Take Charge of the Date - A girl would like if you decided the place and time to meet shows you are willing to take charge and also responsibility. Be assertive but not aggressive. Choose a place you have been before or is well recommended. Make reservations in advance, so there are no surprises when you arrive. Also don't go to a place which you frequent all the time. Its no good if you bump into people you know on your first date, you dont want the situation to get more awkward than it already is.
4. Research your Date - Simply means try finding out few basics about her before you meet her. Also doesn't mean you facebook or twitter stalk her. Find out where she works, which school did she attend, where did she grow up. These things if known help as conversation starters and will help you keep talking.
5. Be a Gentleman - Even the hardest of feminists expect chivalry, open the door for her, stand up when she gets up, ALWAYS PAY THE BILL. Do offer a ride back home or to be dropped where ever she wishes to go, especially at night. It doesn't matter if you dont have your own car it is the thought that matters. If you have your own car avoid bringing a chauffeur/driver. She is not going to be comfortable getting in the back seat of your car. You can also come across as pompous.
Now comes the Don'ts which are much more
1. Don't Drink too much or if possible don't drink at all - This is a no brainer, you dont want to come across as a drunk or someone who needs to have alcohol in their system to talk to women. Overdoing drinking on the first date shows that you enjoy your drink more than the company.
2. Don't be Late - Not respecting her and your time is definitely considered rude. A give or take of five to ten minutes is acceptable. Always helps to be early, you can choose a table of your liking. Makes you more relaxed and calm. You will have the opportunity to pull a chair for her.
3. Don't check out other women also don't stare at her - She would be well aware that you might find another woman attractive but its not something which you make obvious. If you stare at her chest or ass, you simply come across as shallow and petty. Compliment her genuinely, the girl would be well aware of her strengths and weaknesses so if you come across as fake she will figure that out.
4. Don't check your phone, put it on silent.
5. Don't talk about your Ex
6. Don't talk about how much money you make
7. Don't go to places which are too crowded or loud
